No matter where you are in the journey of life, stop being so hard on yourself. You are exactly where you are meant to be at the moment you are at. This is your chance to make a change and to move forward with what you want to do. Do not squander it. Accept yourself, love yourself, and push yourself. You are so incredibly worth it.

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Another great thing to do is to identify your expectations of yourself, others, the world, etc. Are they realistic? Are they unhealthy? Are they things you can work towards or the demands of a spoiled child? The best thing you can do is to accept life as it is. Do not put unhealthy demands on it that cause you to be disappointed and feel “life isn’t fair.” Rather, build healthy ambitions for yourself that you can work towards.

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Because of our brain’s unique neuroplasticity, it really does not take very long to begin to change our habits and routines. In fact, it takes about 45 seconds to simply change our state—state of mind or state of being. That means, in 45 seconds time, you can actually change your mood if you truly focus on it.

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We are conditioned evolutionarily and societally speaking to be negative and to focus on the negative. This book is about recognizing that conditioning and reprogramming it for ourselves so that we are in the driver’s seat of our own minds, thoughts, and actions.

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All this book is meant to do is help you to learn to take everything with a grain of salt and allow you to choose your reality. The goal is to have you move from blaming others to taking responsibility for how you live your life and how you affect the lives of those around you.

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As a society we now love to blame other people for the problems that really lie within ourselves as an individual. We need to stop the self-inflicting negativity and focus on the things that truly make us content. The problem is that we are so bombarded with all the negativity every time we look around that we get lost.

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I am so passionate about human behavior because it is one of the most complex things for us to understand. I love researching, experiencing, and learning about various methods that can increase our brain function while providing us the ability to live a substantial quality of life.

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None of this works overnight. Some of this can take months or even years, but this restructuring is not impossible to do. You’re going to have your challenges and you’re going to have your successes. With every challenge I hope that you learn a lesson that moves you closer to your successes. I hope that every challenge teaches you something that will elevate you in your journey.

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Here’s the thing that no one seems to understand. Money is truly an unlimited resource. Unlike water or oil or even air, as T. Harv Ecker says in his book The Millionaire Mindset, they just keep printing more money. Just because you earn money doesn’t mean someone else has to go without it, so get that limiting thought out of your head. There is truly enough to go around the entire world again and again.

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Money is one of those forbidden topics. Along with politics and religion, you’re not supposed to talk about money in most settings. At least, that is what I have always been told. I guess it’s because so many of us have such a charged and difficult relationship with money. Those of us who do not have it tend to envy those of us who do have it. And those of us who do have it tend to want to keep it for ourselves rather than share it with others.

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When we do not like something about someone, it is usually a characteristic within ourselves. It is the reflection of that characteristic back to us that irritates us. Work on you rather than blaming others. Once you work on changing yourself, you will find that you either are no longer bothered by the other person or you at least have sympathy and understanding for them.

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Technology is a tool. Not a crutch. Do not use it as a replacement for person-to-person interaction, but rather as a supplement. There’s nothing wrong with picking up your phone, but don’t do it during dinner. Communicate through social media, but also communicate face to face.

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We’re all more connected, yet we are more alone than ever before. This isolation is really not good for us. Numerous studies show that feelings of isolation lead to physiological changes within our bodies that lead to illness and even early death. Moreover, studies show that social ties are linked with longer lifespans, decreased stress levels, and increased feelings of well-being overall.

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Things are so easy nowadays that we have all developed a fear of commitment. In fact, many companies have changed their marketing strategies to fit this fear of commitment. You no longer have to commit to a two-year phone contract with a mobile phone company. Now you can get a pay-as-you-go option or even some kind of upgrade plan that lets you change your phone as soon as a new one becomes available.

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The amazing rate that technology has interfered in the social interactions between people is astounding in today’s world. A decade or so ago, if I was standing in line somewhere, I would strike up a conversation with one of the strangers in the line with me. Now, I simply pick up my cell phone and catch up on social media or text messages. I can’t tell you how often I see people out at restaurants all on their phones instead of having actual conversations with each other.

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Everyone says it, but it’s true. The first step to any kind of personal growth is to get yourself a journal. You may have a desire to use your computer or your phone, but please consider using a regular journal and a pen or pencil. Psychologically speaking, we respond better when we handwrite our journal entries; especially in the beginning. Your body is fully engaged and it will enable you to go deeper. Not to mention the fact that there is no chance your journal will start to ring or send you a notification of a new email. A paper journal allows you to focus on you, which is the whole point.

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At some point in each of our lives, we ask ourselves, “Who am I? Why am I here? What is my purpose?” These questions are necessary for our growth and our answers may change as we experience our lives. However, the main aspect of ourselves—who we truly are—our identity, is something that is usually molded as children through young adulthood and stays fairly intact. At least, it should if we have had the chance to properly develop our own identity and sense of self.

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No matter what our goals are, we all need coaches or mentors to help us get there. Why? Because it is hard for us to call ourselves out on our own excuses and mistakes. We will always find a justification. We need someone who is not involved in our daily lives as a friend and who can look at the scenarios going on in our lives or the aspects we are questioning from an unbiased outsider’s perspective. It is vital to find someone who has the experience, the know-how, and the ability to give unbiased opinions to help us evaluate our lives and our goals successfully.

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Some people are not willing to take the time to sit down and really think about not only the direction of their life but also the overall perspective of where they want to get in life. A lot of times they just go week by week, yet they never sit down and say, “This is where I want my life to be in 6 months or 12 months,” or any type of time period. Some think, “Oh I have it up here, all in my head,” but the actuality is that our plans do not become a reality until we put it on paper. We can toss an idea around in our head for hours, days, or years, but it’s never quite as clear as when you see it written down.

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Why are so many of us lacking meaning in our lives? One reason is the pervasive obsession with happiness. It seems that everywhere you look, you run across someone telling you that you should be happy. That you deserve to be happy. That happiness is the point of life.

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We all have a little entitlement inside of us. It is only human, but it is vital that we keep that entitlement in check by continuously and consciously working on our attitude reformation. Entitlement is one of those sentiments that can take over your entire mindset, if you let it. And when that happens the only person you are really hurting is yourself.

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Focus is the key to success in anything. We need a driving point or destination. If you do not have a focus for the next year, or even just the next 10 minutes, before you know it, 10 years can go by.

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How you live your life is completely your choice. You can continue to live as a part of the Walking Dead. There is absolutely nothing wrong with it; the choice is yours. This is simply a call for you to become aware of your choices. Stop blaming society, circumstances, and others for where you are in your life. Happiness, choice, and freedom start within your own mind. You truly hold all the power.

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Patterns are comforting. Our brains like patterns. And we are creatures of routine. Some routines are helpful. A good morning routine can get us through our morning quickly, but living our entire lives on autopilot is not ideal.

If you wake up every day at the same time, brush your teeth the same way, get dressed the same way, maintain your morning, afternoon, and evening rituals every day, etc., you are programming your mind. You are actually “cementing” your memory and your habits. 

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Everything comes down to communication, whether we are communicating with others or even with ourselves. And communication has dramatically changed in just the last decade with the increased use of technology. I can go days now without speaking to someone on the telephone but will have communicated via email and text with more people in that same time frame than I used to in an entire two-week period. Technology is amazing, but we’re becoming even less fluent in human-to-human communication every day that we allow ourselves to become isolated.

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In so much of our world today we take sound bites as fact. We do our research on Facebook and our decision-making based on tweets. Education is no longer valued here in the United States, but rather results are. Instead of ensuring that our children fully understand a concept and can use it to think for themselves, we are more concerned with them knowing how to perform on a standardized test so that our schools “rank” high. But all that ranking means is that our schools get more funding, not that our children are getting better educations. We are so focused on the results that we forget about working with each individual student to ensure they perform at the best of their abilities.

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I love the brain. The brain is more powerful than any super computer and studies have shown we only use 10 percent of our brain capacity, at most. There is so much potential power within our minds and ourselves, but we so often allow ourselves to be numbed out of thinking. It almost seems like constant stimulation is causing desensitization in all aspects of our life. This book is meant as a wake-up call for all of us.

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This book is designed to shock people out of their comfort zones to realize how much of their lives are on autopilot. In order to achieve true contentment in our lives, we must be in full control of our own minds, choices, and actions. We must live life on our own terms.

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